


Safety Net

by Hedgi



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Cisco's guilt complex, Gen, Kinda, Team as Family, emotional hurt comfort, hints at Blackvibe, implications of powers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-15
Updated: 2015-11-15
Packaged: 2018-05-01 16:10:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5212295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hedgi/pseuds/Hedgi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>No one could have known Ray Palmer was alive all that time.<br/>No one but Cisco.<br/>Who now has an even bigger guilt complex than anyone thought possible and is determined to make sure that none of his friends will ever think that no one is coming to their rescue again.</p><p>Post Arrow 4x06, Flash 2x06, Flash and Cisco centric.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Safety Net

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mikkal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mikkal/gifts).



> Inspired by a text message conversation with Mikkal that refused to leave me alone. Just doing my thing, sharing the pain.

Cisco was sitting near Barry’s bedside-- not at it, Iris and Joe were there, but close by, when he got the phone call from Laurel. They’d texted some, not much, and it was...two in the morning, so that was unexpected and probably a bad sign.  He wasn’t sure he could take anymore bad news.

 

When he answered, it sounded like she’d been crying, a little, so that was also sending up red alerts. He tried to keep his voice down as he asked what was wrong, drawing Joe’s worried glance.  
But nothing was wrong, for once. He hung up the phone, his hands shaking.

“Cisco, who was that?” Joe asked, concerned.

“He’s not dead! Ray--Ray Palmer--he’s not dead.”

“The guy with the magic flying suit? Whose office exploded?”

“Yeah, I--I gotta tell Caitlin, and Barry when he’s awake.”

 

Cisco chose to take it as a sign. There were still miracles. If Ray could survive the explosion, and six months of being tiny-- he still didn’t have all the details, Laurel had only said he was alive and had been the size of a lego mini-fig until a few hours ago-- but if that could happen, anything could. Barry’d walk again. They’d find Harry’s daughter. everything would be ok.  
  
~~  
  
As focused as he was on the good parts of the story, the bright sides, because that was what he always did, what he had to do, Cisco still felt awful. Six and a half months. They’d thought Ray was dead, but that--that wasn’t the worst of it. Ray had spent six and a half months thinking that they’d all thought he was dead, that no one was looking for him, no one was coming to rescue him. He’d spent--God, Cisco didn’t know how long, Ray hadn’t said--trapped in a freakin’ box like some kind of trophy or pet, by some megalomaniac dickhead who wanted to use the Atom suit.

 

And he hadn’t known for days if anyone had heard him, if anyone was coming. Cisco felt sick to his stomach. At least he’d only been kidnapped for a day, and he’d known--hoped, more like-- that someone would come looking eventually. No one had written him off as dead. He couldn’t imagine that situation, the loneliness worse not from the isolation but just the knowing that there was no way out.  
  
_I should have done something,_ he thought. _I should have--have tried to sense something. That’s my whole thing, vibing. Seeing what no one else can. If I’d have just known--If I’d have done something, maybe they could have gotten him out sooner._

 

And as soon as that thought occurred, a whole flood of them opened up. What if it happened again? What if--he was part of a damn superhero group, and the total of friends who weren’t part of that was something like maybe four, maybe, and that was if he stretched “friend” and counted Dante. Sooner or later, they’d think someone was dead again. Or there’d be another kidnapping, like…

 

Harry’s daughter. Jesse. She had no way of knowing anyone but her dad--her dad who didn’t have super powers--was looking for her, trying to find a way to get her out of that dark cage. She’d been terrified, and rightly so. They’d save her, Cisco had to believe they would find a way. They were heroes. they always found a way. But sometimes it took so long.

 

And what if something like what had happened to Jesse happened to one of the others? Or something like what had happened to Ray? Even if General Eiling didn’t come after Barry or Firestorm again, he still knew who they were, and what was to keep some other military creep from finishing what Eiling had started? Or any number of villains, known or unknown. If the rogues found out Barry’s threat to lock them all up if they went near any of Team Flash was something he couldn’t follow through on, without Snart to reign them in, or someone new put two and two together...Worry and Worst Case scenarios flooded Cisco’s brain.  
  
Cisco chewed his lip, his fingernail, a pencil. He could find them, his friends, if something went wrong, he was sure of it. He’d need a focus, something connected to them. Harry had mentioned that his jacket had been a birthday gift from his daughter, and the other times he’d vibed on purpose had needed the trigger. But he was sure that with some practice…

 

His eyes were drawn to the table near Barry’s cot. Barry’s watch, the face smashed all to hell, lay there, broken. Without hesitating more than the moment it took to make sure Joe was asleep and Iris was too busy watching Barry’s sleeping face, Cisco snatched it up and slipped out of the room.

 

He held the watch in both hands. _Ok, vibe. Right now. Activate. Any time now._ He sighed, frustrated. Like anything, it would take practice, he knew that, but he hated that. he closed his eyes and strained to reach the part of him that saw, that felt the--what were they, the “vibrations of the universe.”

 

And something clicked, the world went blue and grey, black and white. He could see Joe asleep in his chair and Iris, her head bowed over Barry’s hand, and Barry, the heart monitor slower than it should have been.

 

The vision let him go, and Cisco stuffed the watch into his pocket, then went back to the cortex. Caitlin’s desk. He needed to find something, some safety net, for the next time some lunatic strapped her to a bomb or worse.   
  
~

Cisco knew he should probably tell people what he was doing, but what if they thought it was silly? Or didn’t want him too? He promised himself he’d only try to Vibe on someone if there was 100% need and danger. Most of his practice, as Barry practiced transferring to a wheelchair, was limited to using Harry’s jacket to see if he could learn anything more about Jesse. But all he ever learned was that she was still alive, and hadn’t given up hope.

 

Slowly, he amassed the collection in a desk drawer at the back of his lab space. Barry’s watch, a hair clip Caitlin rarely wore even before he borrowed it. One of Iris’s earrings, broken, one of the many boring ties Joe always had--everyone started keeping a change of clothes at STAR, for which Cisco was glad. He never took anything too significant, nothing that would be missed, that would be _wrong._

 

He’d tell them, when Barry was back on his feet, and he was getting so much closer, so much better. As he practiced standing, supported between Joe and Harry, or Joe and Iris--strong enough to carry Barry through anything--or Joe and Henry, who had taken the first train home with apologies on his lips, Cisco kept his little hoard secret. No one wanted to worry about what ifs and disasters, not now. They shouldn’t have to worry.

 

That was what it was for, though. So that they’d always know, his friends would always know that as long as he was breathing he’d find them. _No one will ever feel like it’s hopeless, like there’s no one coming. Not again. Not if I can do something._

 

~

Team Arrow visited, though not as Team Arrow, just as them, friends, helping Sara move into a new apartment, Felicity offering a few small tech commissions to STAR as a way to build revenue back up, and give Cisco something to do other than sit around with his teeth in his mouth, hoping nothing went wrong as Barry struggled to twitch his toes. And, of course, there was that. Everyone had wanted to make sure Barry was alright. Video footage had hit the internet.

 

“You’re ok, too, right?” Laurel had asked Cisco. “I--I’m glad I called you, after. It was before we saw the news, and--God, if I hadn’t spoken to you, I might have thought…”

 

“I’m ok. We’re all...shaken, but, Barry’s healing, and we’re ok.”

 

“That’s good,” said Ray from behind him in the cortex, and Cisco embraced him.  Only once before, when they’d succeeded in separating Ronnie from Stein, had Cisco thought he truly understood the joy that Padre Manuel had spoken of at Sunday Masses, Mary of Bethany greeting her dead brother restored to life, or the daughter of Jairus. To touch someone who had been lost forever, alive again. But, no, not again. Ronnie, Ray, they’d always been alive. It was just that no one had known.

 

“I’m sorry,” Cisco muttered, and Ray let go.

 

“Sorry? For what? From what I’ve heard, it’s not like you guys here had it any easier--and I’m ok. Like you said, shaken, it’s not like it never happened but--what’s done is done, you know? No one could have known I survived, not at first.”

 

“Cisco are you blaming yourself for something that is in no way your fault again,” Felicity asked from across the room. Cisco winced.

 

“No,” he said, honestly. Because it was, in part, his fault. No one could have known--no one but him.

  
Felicity made a noncommittal noise and went back to talking to Caitlin and Barry about something. Cisco excused himself to go get the cake Linda had made and left in the break room fridge. If this was going to be a party, it needed cake.

~

They couldn’t stay long, needing to get back to Star City and their own problems, their own lives. Cisco traded hugs and handclasps and promised to text Laurel more often. He knew that they had to go, everyone had to go—he got that. He’d worry, they’d worry, one big circle of concern for each other, but—they couldn’t let it get in the way of fighting Zoom, and Darhk, and living.

Of course, it was in the middle of the farewells that Caitlin pulled out her hairclip, dragging Cisco aside. “I was looking for a file for Felicity and found this. Care to explain?” she didn’t look mad so much as confused, but her voice was still just loud enough to draw attention. Cisco winced.

“I…” he could feel everyone watching him, and all the lies he could have offered dried up. Time to face the music, he guessed. Would they think it was stupid? Would team arrow be pissed that he hadn’t told them about his powers—they’d sure as hell been angry about the whole Harry thing. He kept his eyes down. “It’s a, a—a safety net. I have—“ He glanced up, saw Oliver’s eyes, hard as flint, and looked down again. “I was changed by the Accelerator too. Sometimes, if I’m touching something—that belongs to a person, I get these vibes. Visions. I can see them, but I’m not actually there. I can’t always control it. But I’m trying…”

“You’ve been spying on me?” It dawned on Caitlin that she probably should have waited to start this conversation. “I mean—practicing?”

“No,” Cisco shook his head emphatically. “Just—it was just in case, something happened. Like…” his eyes flickered up, caught Ray’s. “So that if something ever happened, where we thought—where you were missing, or Barry, or Joe, or anyone…I could look. I could find you, any of you. So no one would have to think that there was no shot at a rescue, ever again. I was going to tell you—I was going to tell all of you, once—once things were less suck-tastic, and all, I swear. I just—If I’d have known, I know—I could have used it, the vibing, to find—to…help.”

There was silence, and Cisco could feel the judgement, staring. They must think he was so paranoid, never mind that paranoia totally didn’t count when you couldn’t go a week and a half without something horrible happening to one or more of your loved ones, or coworkers, or friends.  Or maybe they were thinking that it was an invasion of privacy. Or that it was a dumb idea, and what good where his visions if he couldn’t control them next to something like the speed Barry was trying to get back, or Oliver’s skill with an Arrow, or…

“I knew it,” Felicity said. “I knew you were blaming yourself for something you are literally in no way at all responsible for. Like. For real, I blame the cockroaches that apparently live in my building’s basement—live _d_ —more than I’d ever blame you.”

Cisco looked up in time to catch movement out of the corner of his eye, and Ray’s hand on his shoulder. “Cisco, you already saved my life once before. And this—it sucked, but I’m not dead. I’m home. It worked out. It did. So please don’t beat yourself up over this. I already had to tell Felicity she wasn’t allowed to blame herself for not getting my messages sooner, and –the same goes for you. All of you.”

“But I could have—“ Cisco started

“Maybe,” Ray held up a hand. “Or maybe not. It doesn’t,” he paused, took a breath, continued. “It doesn’t matter. What matters is that we’re all here. Ok. Getting through everything. That’s all any of us can really ask for, right?”

“It’s a good idea,” Oliver said, breaking the awkward silence after Ray stopped rambling. Cisco’s head snapped in his direction. “Something like what you can do…It’d be a good idea, to keep focuses on hand. In the event of some disaster. Our lives aren’t exactly safe. Having a—safety net, knowing that someone might be able to tell if we were gone—It’s good.” He fumbled at his wrist, undid a cufflink, and held it out.

It was like a floodgate as everyone dug in pockets and purses, and Cisco felt himself deflate not in despair but relief. No one thought it was silly, or childish. They thought it was good, a viable plan, something useful.

Useful. Cisco hated being helpless, as his friends risked life and limb. Maybe now he wouldn’t be. He accepted the cufflink, and the other odds and ends laid on the desk next to him. “I won’t let you down, any of you.”

“I know,” Barry said from where he stood, crutches under his arms and leaning against a wall more than standing, but still. He smiled. “We all know.”

Cisco felt his cheeks go hot at the attention, but ducked his head in a nod. “I hope I don’t have to use this.”

“I hope so, too.” Ray grinned, the smile a little more wan than it might have been seven months ago. “But it’s nice to know you’ve got our backs.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Remember remember, it's comment November....


End file.
